If you give a mouse a piano

He's probably going to ask you to move it... If you move the piano for him, he's probably going to want you to tune it. This is true both of mice and men. And so when we got a piano, it wasn't long before we were in need of a tuner. Our piano tuner was a small and awkward fellow. My mother had warned me that all piano tuners are a strange breed. Ours seemed to be friendly enough, and engaged me in conversation: "Living in the city must be nice" he said.

"Yea, it's pretty sweet."

"Great place to stay in shape"

"I guess if you bike around"

"You do that much?"

"Not too much since my bike lock broke in dupont circle, and has been holding my bike prisoner ever since."

"Well, you able to stay in shape anyway? How much do you weigh?"

"Not too much."

"Here, lets see if I can pick you up over my shoulder."

"Hello what?"

This is where the conversation took a turn for the worse. Also the piano tuner started to stutter.

"c-c-c-come on let's see if I can pick you up over my shoulder."

At this point the tuner was giving me a classic puppy dog with outstretched arms.

"w-w-we could just try it..."

You know what they say... you let a mouse pick you up over his shoulder and he's going to want you to give him a scalp massage, and if you give him a scalp massage, he's going to want to dress you up in his mother's lingerie...

Anyway to cut to the chase ... our piano is now tuned - hoorah!!